The holiday season is a time of joy, but also a time of stress as we strive to create perfect holiday memories. Here are 5 ways to help you not sweat the small stuff during this busy time so that you can enjoy the season.
Growing up as a Chinese-Canadian immigrant, Christmas was one of the first holidays I fell in love with and wanted to adopt into our Chinese immigrant home as a child. My mother indulged me with a faux Christmas tree and ornaments that I was responsible for putting up and taking down since I was 9.
I desperately wanted to create the picture-perfect holiday experiences that I saw on TV and in the movies as that was my only frame of reference at the time. My Hong Kong-Chinese parents did not have holiday traditions for Christmas beyond gift exchanging and opening on Boxing Day which was the Chinese norm in Hong Kong.
I was not brought up with the illusion of Santa Claus or a big stuffed turkey dinner. Instead, our Christmas dinner menu was usually crispy baked chicken, stir-fried crab and steamed fish. Along with putting up the faux Christmas tree, I wrapped all the family presents that I would carefully place under the tree, including my own.
Growing up, I often fantasized about the Christmas that I would create for my children once I had a family of my own.
Ironically, by the time I did have children of my own, my husband and I had relocated back to Hong Kong. The Canadian white Christmas scenes of my childhood were replaced with a harbour city landscape of sparkling Christmas lights on skyscrapers. The larger Canadian home that could fit a Christmas tree was now a small 700 foot 3 bedroom apartment, that could only hold a mini faux Christmas tree.
Still, I tried to create some magic of Christmas for my children with stories of Santa Claus and secretly hiding and wrapping their Christmas gifts to place under the tree on Christmas Eve. I delighted in their excited faces as they went to bed in anticipation of what Santa would deliver as they slept. I relished their delight as they opened their presents on Christmas morning.
In my family, as a child and as an adult, I was responsible for creating the Christmas holiday experience. It is quite a stressful endeavour at any age.
The holiday season can be a time of joy and celebration, but it can also bring about stress and overwhelm as we pressure ourselves to get the perfect gifts, cook the perfect meal or host the perfect gathering. No matter where and how you create your holiday season memories, here are 5 ways to help you not sweat the small stuff during this busy time.
1. Prioritize What Truly Matters
When you think about what made your past holiday seasons special, I bet you remember the people you spent it with and the connection moments more than you recall what you received as a gift that year or served for dinner that night.
As you plan your holiday season, it helps to identify the aspects that are most important to you and prioritize them. Reflect on the values and traditions that bring you joy and focus on achieving those moments.
Whenever you feel yourself getting stressed and feeling overwhelmed with the minutia of small stuff, go back to your priorities list. Remind yourself to let go of unnecessary expectations and obligations and focus on creating meaningful experiences instead.
2. Set Realistic Expectations
The postcard-perfect Christmas scenes that you see in the movies and media are just perfect within the frame of the camera in that instant. When you zoom out to see the full scene, you will see the chaos of props, lights, equipment and the village of people it took to create that moment.
So why create stress for ourselves with unrealistic expectations?
It's important to set realistic expectations for yourself and others during the holiday season. Life is never perfect at any time of the year, so why expect it to be at Christmas? Embrace imperfections and find joy in the unique moments that unfold. Things may not go perfectly, but that's okay. Those imperfect moments make for the best memories and stories that you will happily share in the future.
3. Maintain Boundaries
During the busy festive season, it's easy to overextend yourself with so much to do, and so many activities and commitments in this short period. In fear of missing out on any of the festivities, it's easy to end up over-committed and overwhelmed.
It's okay to set boundaries to protect your time, energy and well-being during the holiday season. Communicate your boundaries and limits without feeling guilty. Keep your priorities in mind and simplify the to-do list and activities to achieve what's most important to you.
When you have clarity on your values and priorities for the holiday season, it's easier to discern your boundaries and how to say no to activities and obligations that will cause you stress instead of creating joy.
4. Focus on Meaningful Connections
In my blog How Generosity and Giving Can Benefit Your Health and Happiness, I share 8 benefits of being generous and giving and 8 ways to do it all year round. None of the 8 ways to give require lavish gifts or breaking the bank.
In another article, Gifts From Heart to Heart, I share 5 questions to help you choose the best gift for those close to your heart. Being generous with gifting your time, attention and appreciation to the special people in your life is often the most valuable gift of all.
The best gifts of the holiday season are ones that create memories and experiences that spread joy and strengthen relationships. Engage in activities that foster connection, such as sharing meals, having conversations, playing games, or volunteering together. Instead of getting caught up in materialistic aspects, prioritize meaningful connections with loved ones.
5. Practice Gratitude and Mindfulness
During the busy holiday season, there will inevitably be some elevated stress levels to get so much done in a short window of time. It's easy to get caught up in the busyness of the season and neglect self-care.
In the spirit of spreading joy, it's important to also give to yourself by practicing mindfulness and gratitude so that you can give to others.
Reflect on things that you appreciate during the holiday season. Be fully engaged in experiencing joyful moments. Take time to recharge and nurture yourself by making time for activities that help you relax and rejuvenate mentally, emotionally and physically. It may be difficult with all the festivities, but remember to get rest, eat nourishing foods and stay physically active.
Many Ways of Sharing Joy
The holiday season means different things to each of us. While it's a time of celebration, it can also be a time of grief and sadness for those who are missing loved ones or cannot be together to celebrate.
Living in Hong Kong away from my family and friends in Canada, each year I feel a twinge of sadness in missing them and the white Christmases that I grew up with. Adding to that sadness is not being with my sons who are studying and living in Canada and cannot visit with us this Christmas.
This year, I have poured my heart into my mindful art creations (pictured above) to send across the globe to share some joy with friends and family near and far. It's my way of reminding those I care about that we are connected no matter where we celebrate this holiday season.
Remember that the true essence of the holidays lies in connection, gratitude, and celebration. Embrace the spirit of the season and let go of the unnecessary stress. Allow yourself to fully enjoy the moments that matter most.
Some additional articles you may find helpful:
Seven Ways to Cope with Holiday Stress - Online Article - psychiatry.org
How Generosity and Giving Can Benefit Your Health and Happiness - Online Article - AYCLimitless.com
Gifts From Heart to Heart - Online Article - AYCLimitless.com
Thank you for spending time on AYCLimitless.com
Please share and subscribe if you enjoyed your time on the site.
Comments