Define what a "good life" means to you and then build it with the same focus and energy that you put into your career or business. Three effective business leadership practices to help build a life you love.
One of my favourite TEDTalks is Robert Waldinger's, "What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness." It's saved on my YouTube Favorites list and I watch it annually since I discovered it. Every year, it becomes even more relevant.
What makes a "good life"? Most people define it by their life values, relationships and time. They will talk about people they love, special moments in life and the value they have contributed to both.
There may be differences when you ask someone in their 20s, 40s or 60s. But you can bet that family and friends will rank somewhere on a person's top 3 list of what makes their life good or what they love about their lives.
What would be less likely to appear on the top 3 list are job titles, dream houses and the latest luxury designer handbag.
And yet we are taught to chase after the job, the house and the life luxuries as symbols of a good life. We are encouraged to pour our time and energy into our careers in the pursuit of success and happiness.
Last week I shared How to Build an Engaged Mindset and Thrive at Work and discussed how being engaged at work impacts how we engage in our lives outside of work. This week I want to look at how we can be better engaged in our personal lives, where we tend to live by default or on autopilot.
Yes, a career and earning a living is a life necessity. As the saying goes, we should work to live, not live to work. Yet the effort we put into planning and executing our professional life is often much greater than the effort we put into our personal lives.
Do you have a personal vision or mission statement?
Do you have a 360-degree strategy for your growth, development and overall health?
Do you have regular performance appraisals to evaluate your effectiveness in the relationships and areas of your life that matter most?
Sounds silly, doesn't it? Yet these are tools that we use to be effective in our professional lives where we strive to be successful. Would there be some benefit to taking this approach to our lives outside of work? To impact the values and relationships that matter even more?
Here are three effective business practices that can help us to build a life we love beyond our life at work.
1. Creating a Personal Mission Statement
Successful companies have clear vision and mission statements to define their company culture and operations. Many of us have a vision or mission for our career goals based on where we want to be in 2-5-10 years to help guide our decisions and actions.
Why not apply this practice to our personal lives instead of leaving it to chance or living by default?
A personal mission statement can help you identify your values and goals and define what matters most to you. Having a personal mission statement can help align and guide your life decisions, how you spend your time, and how you interact with others.
I first learned the concept of creating a personal mission statement from my favourite OG self-help book, "7 Habits of Highly Effective People" by Dr. Stephen Covey. This practice has helped me through stressful periods in my corporate life and personal life when dealing with crises or making important decisions.
Having a personal mission statement has also helped me in overcoming fear and anxiety. You can see what my statement looks like and examples of how it has impacted my life in my blog, Beat Imposter Syndrome With the Power of Personal Purpose.
A good way to approach creating your personal mission statement is the 80th Birthday visualization exercise. Imagine it's your 80th birthday. Who would you want to be surrounded by as you celebrate? What would they say about you in tribute? How would they celebrate you?
Who you hope to be surrounded by and the qualities that you hope they will celebrate about you are your guiding principles, values and relationships you want to build in your life.
"Writing or reviewing a mission statement changes you because it forces you to think through your priorities deeply and carefully, and to align your behaviour with your beliefs."
Dr. Stephen R. Covey
Here is the video link to Franklin Covey's 7 Habits Video Preview: 80th Birthday. Watch Dr. Stephen Covey expand on the impact that creating a personal mission statement can have on building a life you love.
To find out more about the power of personal mission statements and how to write one, check out these helpful articles:
Why You Need a Personal Mission Statement - Online Article - forbes.com
How to Write a Personal Mission Statement - Online Article - indeed.com
2. Creating a Roles & Goals Life Plan
In business, it's important to set goals, define roles and set actions for execution for success. The same would apply to building a life you love.
If you want to be surrounded by people who love you and want to celebrate you at your 80th birthday party, you will need to work on the role you play in their lives.
There are many meaningful roles we play in life that define who we are aside from our professional titles. Here is an excerpt from my blog Defining Your New Normal: Protecting Work-life Balance on how to establish your roles & goals.
Try this exercise to see if you are making the most of the valuable roles you play outside of the workplace.
Make a list of the top 5 roles that are important to you in your life. Example: Son/Daughter, Father/Mother, Brother/Sister, Aunt/Uncle, Friend, Teacher, Coach, etc.
Next to each role, give a rating between 1-10 (1 is low importance, 10 is high importance) on the importance of that role to you.
Then give yourself an honest score on how you are doing in each role from 1-10 (1 is doing poorly, 10 is doing extremely well).
Then list actions that you need to take to maintain, sustain or excel in each of these roles and how frequently you need to take action.
Look at the roles where the importance rating and how well you are doing are not in sync, these are the imbalances you may feel and can be areas where you can focus on balancing first.
Now schedule the activities into your calendar or write yourself visible reminders to take action accordingly. Commit to being who you want to be in each of your priority life roles.
Example:
The Role | The importance of this role to me. (1-10 rating) | How am I doing in this role? (1-10 rating) | What actions will I take to maintain, sustain or excel in this role? |
|---|---|---|---|
Mother | 10 | 8 |
|
Mentor to my nephew | 8 | 8 |
|
The roles we play may take on different priorities at different times in our lives. But they all need a commitment and discipline with behaviour and actions to maintain, sustain and excel.
3. Conducting Quarterly and Annual Life Reviews
Life is busy and time passes quickly as we continually chase after the next deadline or project. When we conduct quarterly and annual reviews in our professional lives, it allows us to reflect on successes and opportunities and plan better next steps. These reviews allow us to improve and grow professionally.
Would we not benefit from this practice in our personal lives?
At the end of December, we instinctively start to think about New Year's resolutions for the next year and reflect on the year that has transpired. For many of us, those New Year's resolutions are a passing thought that is abandoned as soon as we get busy with the new calendar year.
In our professional lives, conducting regular performance reviews as it is a part of our productivity accountability and even pay incentives. Although we dread the formality in our work setting, the practice can be adapted to motivate us in our personal lives.
Here are some suggestions:
Make the process fun and customized to your personality.
Give yourself an inspirational theme for the year ahead and set sub-themes for each quarter to help define your focus.
Start a journal format that works for you to capture your successes and document challenges or obstacles.
Define incentives and rewards for achieving your goals.
Schedule your timely reviews and commit to doing them.
My 2022 Example: Reconnecting IRL (in-real-life) in the New Normal Environment
Q1: Reconnecting to a Social Life
Meet with close friends at least once every other week for a catch-up lunch or dinner.
Have a weekly outing activity with my husband.
Resuming family gatherings with extended family.
Q2: Reconnecting to Growth Opportunities
Re-acquaint with paused business connections.
Find new networking opportunities.
Find new community volunteering opportunities.
Defining and Building "A Good Life" You Love is Your Choice
We all are given the one precious life we live. It would be a shame to live it in default instead of choosing to take action to make it a happier and healthier life we love.
When we have clarity from our personal mission statement and a plan to achieve our roles & goals, we can define and build our own uniquely "good life". When we have gratitude and appreciation for the good in our lives, we can share without fear and be a part of the good in the lives of people who matter to us most.
Robert Waldinger's TED Talk has been viewed by 22M on YouTube and 42M on TED.com. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend taking 13 minutes to do so. Perhaps it will end up on your favourites list as well.
"The clearest message from this 75-year study is this: Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period. ...The people who fared the best were the people who leaned into relationships with friends, family and community."
Robert Waldinger
I would love to hear your comments!
What is your definition of a "good life"?
What are your most important roles and goals?
What is your theme for the second half of 2022?
Thank you for spending time on AYCLimitless.com
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